Still a Little Sad, Not Sure Why

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Still feeling emotionally unstable. Next week I am joining the Rec Center to walk and swim and hopefully boost my spirits. I can go for free with Medicare.

Trip to Wisconsin

We left for Wisconsin on September 12th. We stayed the first night at the Little America Hotel in Cheyenne WY.  We then traveled all through the flat and boring state of Nebraska.  Randy wanted to take route 90 instead of the regular way to get to Wisconsin so although we did go through some of Iowa, we also went into Minnesota for a few miles.  The second night, we stayed in Lincoln Nebraska. We went swimming in the pool and sat the hot tub there.

The third night we crossed over into Wisconsin near the Mississippi and stayed at La Crosse Wis.  The next day we drove east towards Green Bay.  We saw lots of pretty green fields, fir trees and other trees and lots of farms and barns and even a goat farm. Everything was so clean looking and so well tended. There is no desert there so there were no dried up grass or weeds. There are also no mountains, so the sky looks very large.

We arrived at Tammy's beautiful home around noon the third day. It was over cast and damp and looked a lot like the Pacific Northwest.  Tammy's house is located on a cul-de-sac where there are about 4 other homes and they are all high end homes. She lives next to a DR. She gave us the grand tour. She has posted photos of her home on her blog so I won't say anymore except that the house is very large, beautiful and has a lot of storage space and a beautiful yard with fountains, fenced in, private and very green and she does not have to water. She has two decks, upper and lower and an outside balcony on the 2nd floor.  I think her house sits on 1/2 acre. She got the house for a steal and the most wonderful thing about it, is that the previous owners left a piano, lots of wall art, all the window fashions, art and paintings, 2 beds and bedding, end tables and patio furniture just to name a few. The house has 3 fireplaces and a hot tub. We sat in the hot tub during our visit. She actually has three different living rooms, the formal living room, the TV Room and the family Room.  There are lots of shelves everywhere. She has a formal dining room and hutch. It's too bad everyone is so far away because that place was just made for entertaining.

Green Bay is a very clean city with lots of beautiful homes which are well tended. There are lots of beautiful churches, mostly Catholic. I did not see any LDS churches so that was weird. The church bells ring every day from the Catholic school near by.

Charlie is a wonderful cook. He fixed his famous hamburgers and his wonderful turkey. He and Randy went to the cheese factory (Wisconsin is known for cheese) and got some cheese curds. They were yummy.  Jacob got a permanent job there packaging baby wipes and it's right near where Charlie works.

We took a trip on the Green Bay Peninsula to Door County. We saw lots of wineries, bed and breakfast places, tourist attractions, and just beautiful scenery. It was kind of cold and damp though. We went to Lake Michigan which is one of the great lakes. You cannot see where it ends. It seems as big as the ocean. There is no swimming there though. The water is very cold. We enjoyed eating at a little dig Called "The Rusty Tractor." I also bought some fudge at one of the little shops in the area.

While there, we also went to a train museum where Randy was excited that he could hardly contain himself. His grandpa used to work for the railroad and got on the train with him many times. These were the old black coal burning steam engines. There was a large display of trains there but Randy's favorite was the Big Boy which was enormous.

We were going to go home through South Dakota to Mt Rushmore and on to Devils Tower in Wyoming, but we were just too worn out. I hope we can go next time we go that way and we should go there first before going to Tammy's so we won't be so worn out.  I am going to have to start flying again because it's so far to visit her. Randy won't fly, so I guess I will go alone. However, we will both try to drive there again in the summer when it will be warm there. 

One the way home, we had tons of rain coming down really fast. We stayed in Austin MN the first night, Grand Island NE the 2nd and Little America in Wyo the third night. We had a great time. It's good to be home though, but our place just doesn't measure up to Tammy's place.  And I need to mention that I did have to go buy warmer clothes because I did not bring enough with me. Tammy said the weather had been nice until we got there.

Summer News

Summer is nearly over and that is so hard to believe! We started out in April going to Crystal Hot Springs and camping there with Jay and Monica. Next, we camped at Palisades in Sanpete County. Then we went to Arizona to the South Rim of the Grand Canyon. We rode the train and it was very neat experience. We stayed in our trailer in Williams Arizona which is the gateway to the south rim. It is on Route 66 there and it's like an old 50's town with a 50's theme, malts, ice cream sodas and juke boxes in all the eating establishments. Then we went down to the hot part of Arizona in Mesa, (we left the trailer at the campsite) and visited with Randy's friends, Starr, Lisa and Marc.

Then we went camping up Timpangos area at Timpanooke then Little Mill and Granite Flat. Tina and her family were camped in that area for a couple of days with Jesse and Raia so we visited with them. Then we went back to Little Mill and to a very lovely spot right by the river. Then we went camping at Lakeside Campground near Utah Lake. Monica and Jay joined us there. I had a good time swimming there and Matt and Kelly came up for Matt's birthday. After doing all that camping, we are a little tired and so we are done camping for the year. In all, we camped over 30 days this summer. In May, two little babies arrived: Kelby from Matt and Kelly, Kennedy from Contessa and Lorin. In August another little one arrived: Keira from Felicia and Brandon.

Tammy moved to Wisconsin so we had a farewell party for her. We also had a baby shower for Michael and Brooke who are expecting a baby boy in December. Then Jennifer and Rob and the kids were in town and they stayed at Kipp's canyon house and we went there for a BBQ until Jennifer had to head back home. They had been on very long road trip for two weeks.

Our next adventure is that we are going to travel over 1500 miles to Wisconsin to visit Tammy and see her new place. We want to visit before winter because winters are bad in the midwest. We will travel through Wyoming, Nebraska and Iowa to get there. I have been to Wyoming, Nebraska and Iowa but never to Wisconsin. I wish to see the Great Lakes as I have always wanted to. On the way home, we may head back through South Dakota and see MT Rushmore and then on to northeast Wyoming to see Devil's tower. After that, I guess we will just be stuck at home for a long and dreary winter. I hope we can camp again next year. It is a lot of work but something we both love. It is getting harder for Randy because of his arthritis but it keeps us both active at least.

Hope all of you enjoyed the summer. All our love. Rita and Randy

Tear Water Tea

I have had an exciting summer and I need to start writing more in this blog. I have tons of things to write about but I just can't seem to get into it. For some reason, depression has reared it's ugly head and I am not sure what the reason is.  There is very little reason for this to be happening. But it just doesn't seem to want to leave me much as I would like it to.

I keep thinking about the past, Alex, my kids and how everything has changed and that is the way things are supposed to be. I now have an even larger family with new little ones. I have a lot to be thankful for. I have good husband and children, time to travel and many other blessings, so I can't say what is wrong. I worry all the time that something will happen and I don't even know what it is or what it will be. I know a lot this started when I realized that I could not ever have a close relationship with some of my family. And my baby girl moved away but I know I can talk with her on the phone or on Facebook but I will miss my Savannah. A lot of family members live far apart. I also think I may still be suffering from post traumatic stress syndrome for what happened over 6 years ago with all those deaths and all my illnesses. I was so busy with work and trying to take care of my parent's affairs and dealing with family members that maybe I just didn't get a chance to grieve properly.  I had to put my feelings on the back burner. Now that I have to time to sit back and enjoy life, something is coming back to haunt me.

I hope I soon start feeling better and can get back with the program. I need to get over it but I can't really lay a finger on what I have to get over. I have a lot of things I want to put in my blog but right now, I just can't seem to tackle it. One of my daughters said she had not cried for a long time. I cry everyday. I hope it heals me. If I knew what it was that was causing this tear water tea, maybe it would help, but I just don't know. It's hard when you don't even know why it is happening and then feeling guilty that you should not be feeling this way. I just needed to vent and I love all my family and I know with time I will feel better.